Its randomly random
[16:55]I am going after the weekend. I stayed at home on Saturday and even Sunday and I am going back now on Monday. It was half day anf most of the students were not going to college today so I also skipped today. The bus was stopped for the past fifteen minutes and now it’s started again. Now I wanted to go the washroom to pee. But it was raining heavily outside.
So, I didn’t go. Too bad. I can now only pee on reaching Chandigarh.
I am in Bikaner right now which is also my birth place. The temperature is going above 45° C (113°F) everyday. And I come to Bikaner every year in June because it’s my mother’s house. She visits every year in June. Although I do love this city, I still sometimes wish my mother was from someone hill station like Mount Abu or maybe from Himachal or Uttrakhand. Then, it would have been a relief from this Indian heat wave
Okay throwing all dreams and hopes and wishes and desires aside. I am only gonna wish for a big house. I really want to live in a big house at the perfect location.
Why do I always forget that I should not speak too much. I am stupid and that’s why everything I say is purely dumb shit. I should just keep my mouth shut. I swear I won’t bother my cousin Chunmun again.
[11:50]Right now I am outside my school. Its lunch time. <Faking>Man, I’m loving it. What a great day. My practical file is incomplete. So I have to draw graphs. And I love drawing graphs </Faking>. Lunch time is about to get over. I better get back in.
[17:05] oh, what a day. So many graphs. But finally its completed. Got it checked and stamped. Physics practical exam tomorrow. Madam told me that I most probably have to do:
1. Travelling microscope
2. Finding specific resistance of meter bridge.
Hope I do well. Tomorrow is Friday and Fridays are lucky for me. Thank god it’s Friday.
I am 17. Turning 18 in 5 months. I still feel like a child. I mean I haven’t done any one of the grown up stuff. I have never had alcohol. Never had any drugs. Never had a party. Never even been kissed. No girlfriends. No nothing. I even forget my phone and money with me when I go out. But I was fine with it. I was good in studies. I used to be a nerd. I just thought I would get into an IIT or some other top college and get a good job. But now I have all the qualities of a nerd except being good in academics. All my chances of going to a good college are shattered. I got no plans. God help me. Although, I don’t want to but I’ve been feeling hopeless. Please help me God. Get me out of it.
My sister called me today. She wanted to talk about studies. That’s all we talked about. She asked how my preperations are going. I just told her that I am only focused on boards right now. She recommended to prepare for BITSAT side by side qs syllabus and difficulty level is just the same. Yeah, great idea. Pffft. So yeah I’m gonna purchase that BITSAT book. I am gonna get much more busier <FAKING> and I love it. I love being busy I am a workaholic and I love studying.</FAKING>. I wish it were true.
Enough of this laziness. I quit it. I quit being lazy. I have work to do. I got less than 35 days to go for my CBSE 12th board exams. And I’ve got a lot to study. I cannot afford this wastage of time amymore. I promise not to waste a moment starting from the moment I wake up tomorrow morning. I don’t know how but I will get 90+ and I will get a respectable in JEE MAINS 2019 examinations which is being held twice a year for the very first time in history. I have failed the January one. I have to do something in the April one. I cannot drop. I have to got climb out of this phase.
JUST BE WISE
Man, What am I doing?? I can’t keep wasting my time. I won’t get anything from those girls. My studies are more important. I promise to study hard tomorrow. Nothing will stop me from achieving my goals tomorrow. And why was I watching youtube. It’s such a waste of time. I decided to quit it but yet here I am. I watched ‘oversimplified’ for an hour and then I watched ‘Courage the cowardly dog.’ Why?? I promise it won’t happen again.
Jatayu 